4M

UPDATE: So it turns out I’m not lame after all, I’m a Mastermind Rational. An introvert who spends a lot of time thinking, intuiting, and judging the world around me. This explains why the people I like best are complementary personality types: extroverted feely types. I can’t ever figure them out but I sure have fun trying. Unfortunately, it looks like my personality type more or less dooms my romantic chances. Oh well. Can’t have it all I guess. Will have to settle for ruling the world.

–original post follows–

This has nothing to do with anything, but it’s been on my mind, so I thought I would exorcise it by blogging it.

I’m really lame. No, really. I know you find this hard to believe. But it’s true.

What I mean is, I’m socially lame. I suck at small talk. I’m abominable at flirting. I’m terrified of strangers and in particular cute strangers. There’s a guy I’ve had a raging, earth-shattering crush on for, oh about four years now, and every time I see him I turn into a blithering grinning idiot and it’s all I can do to stay as silent as possible so I don’t completely embarrass myself. Oh, how I would just like to nibble on the slope of his shoulder one good time. But anyway.

Even the people I know and like, I have trouble talking to. They think I’m a great listener, and I am, but it’s only because when I’m listening I don’t have to actually talk. I’m also a great secret-keeper, but that’s mostly because I forget stuff as soon as you tell it to me unless I write it down, but that’s another story.

I can only do the gussy-up thing once in a while. I just do not know where people get the energy to be dressed up, made up and done up every minute of every day. Like my sister Rhonda, for example. I swear she wakes up in the morning made up, hair coiffed and fully designer-dud-clothed with perfect matching accessories.

All I can think is, it sure is a good thing I have a job where I can wear sweats and slippers and email people instead of talking to them!

Is there any cure for chronic lameness?

This entry was posted on Wednesday, December 7th, 2005 at 4:14 pm and is filed under Life in Marisaland. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.